{"id":1430,"date":"2025-04-28T18:21:34","date_gmt":"2025-04-28T16:21:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/?p=1430"},"modified":"2025-06-08T17:57:44","modified_gmt":"2025-06-08T15:57:44","slug":"when-the-loyal-friend-is-not-who-they-seem","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/when-the-loyal-friend-is-not-who-they-seem\/","title":{"rendered":"When the loyal friend is not who they seem"},"content":{"rendered":"
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De chica crec\u00ed rodeada de gente que fumaba a nuestro alrededor. Era normal: los adultos fumaban y los ni\u00f1os simplemente est\u00e1bamos cerca. Recuerdo que cuando jug\u00e1bamos a \u201cla mam\u00e1 y el pap\u00e1\u201d o a \u201cla agencia de viajes\u201d, us\u00e1bamos los colores como si fueran cigarrillos.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

A los 14 a\u00f1os fum\u00e9 por primera vez con una amiga. Est\u00e1bamos en un centro comercial con ventanas enormes donde pod\u00edamos ver lo \u201ccool\u201d que nos ve\u00edamos. En mi juventud ya se sab\u00eda que fumar era malo, pero segu\u00eda siendo s\u00edmbolo de rebeld\u00eda y estilo.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Fum\u00e9 durante m\u00e1s de 15 a\u00f1os. Cuando naci\u00f3 mi segunda hija, decid\u00ed dejarlo por completo. Fue dif\u00edcil, porque el cigarro me acompa\u00f1aba en todo: al acostarme, al levantarme, en el ba\u00f1o, en la universidad, en los restaurantes, en las fiestas y hasta en los velorios. Era el \u201camigo fiel\u201d. Pero tuve que escoger, y eleg\u00ed parar.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Mi hermana muri\u00f3 de c\u00e1ncer de boca, entre otras complicaciones. Sin embargo, a pesar de eso, despu\u00e9s de su muerte, ca\u00ed en una tristeza profunda y, volv\u00ed a refugiarme en el viejo amigo. Al principio solo me acompa\u00f1aba en el almuerzo y en la noche. Pero cada vez sent\u00eda que lo necesitaba m\u00e1s, y cuando no lo ten\u00eda, la ansiedad me invad\u00eda.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Felizmente, esa segunda \u201camistad\u201d dur\u00f3 pocos meses. Esta vez eleg\u00ed el deporte y mi salud.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Hoy veo con preocupaci\u00f3n c\u00f3mo el \u201cviejo amigo\u201d se ha disfrazado en nuevas formas: vapeadores, snus, cigarrillos electr\u00f3nicos. Cada vez m\u00e1s adolescentes se inician en el vapeo pensando que es inofensivo, que \u201cno pasa nada\u201d, o que es simplemente parte de ser aceptado.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Pero detr\u00e1s del vapor dulce y las luces de colores, se esconde la misma trampa: la falsa compa\u00f1\u00eda que promete aliviar la ansiedad, la tristeza o el aburrimiento, y que en realidad termina at\u00e1ndolos silenciosamente.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Todos tenemos momentos de ansiedad, tristeza, soledad o vulnerabilidad. Es en esos momentos cuando buscamos soluciones inmediatas: alcohol, tabaco, vapeo, hierba, entre otros.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

\u00bfY si, en lugar de hacernos da\u00f1o, aprendi\u00e9ramos a gestionar esa ansiedad de otra manera? Hacer deporte, llamar a un amigo, tomar una ducha fr\u00eda, respirar profundo, pedir ayuda profesional para transitar esos momentos\u2026 Comunicar para sanar y avanzar es un acto de humildad y compasi\u00f3n con uno mismo. No es una p\u00e9rdida, es un verdadero triunfo.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

A esos padres, madres y cuidadores:<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\r\n

Nuestros adolescentes necesitan menos juicios y m\u00e1s acompa\u00f1amiento consciente. Necesitan saber que no est\u00e1n solos para enfrentar la presi\u00f3n social, la ansiedad y el dolor. Hablemos con ellos, escuchemos de verdad, eduquemos con el ejemplo. <\/span>El amor y la presencia son los verdaderos \u201camigos fieles\u201d que s\u00ed salvan vidas.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

\u201cEl primer paso hacia la grandeza es ser honesto con uno mismo<\/strong>.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\r\n

\u2014 <\/span>S\u00e9neca<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t

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As a child, I grew up surrounded by people who smoked around us. It was normal: adults smoked, and children were simply nearby. I remember that when we played \u201chouse\u201d or \u201ctravel agency,\u201d we used colored pencils as if they were cigarettes.<\/p>

At 14, I smoked for the first time with a friend. We were at a shopping mall with huge windows where we could see how \u201ccool\u201d we looked. Even back then, it was known that smoking was bad, but it was still a symbol of rebellion and style.<\/p>

I smoked for over 15 years. When my second daughter was born, I decided to quit for good. It was hard because cigarettes accompanied me in everything: when going to bed, waking up, in the bathroom, at university, in restaurants, at parties, and even at funerals. It was the \u201cloyal friend.\u201d But I had to choose \u2014 and I chose to stop.<\/p>

My sister died from mouth cancer, among other complications. Still, despite that, after her death, I fell into a deep sadness and went back to seeking refuge in the old friend. At first, it only accompanied me during lunch and at night. But little by little, I felt like I needed it more and more, and when I didn\u2019t have it, anxiety took over.<\/p>

Fortunately, that second \u201cfriendship\u201d lasted only a few months. This time, I chose sports and my health.<\/p>

Today, I watch and see with concern how the \u201cold friend\u201d has taken on new forms: vapes, snuss, electronic cigarettes. More and more teenagers are starting to vape, thinking it\u2019s harmless, that \u201cnothing happens,\u201d or that it\u2019s just part of being accepted.<\/p>

But behind the sweet vapor and colorful lights hides the same trap: the false companionship that promises to relieve anxiety, sadness, or boredom \u2014 and that in reality ends up binding them silently.<\/p>

We all have moments of anxiety, sadness, loneliness, or vulnerability. It\u2019s during those moments that we look for immediate solutions: alcohol, tobacco, vaping, weed, among others.<\/p>

But what if, instead of hurting ourselves, we learned to manage that anxiety in other ways? Exercising, calling a friend, taking a cold shower, breathing deeply, seeking professional help to get through those moments\u2026 Communicating in order to heal and move forward is an act of humility and self-compassion. It is not a loss \u2014 it is a true triumph.<\/p>

To parents, caregivers, and guardians,
<\/b>Our teenagers need less judgment and more conscious support. They need to know they are not alone in facing social pressure, anxiety, and pain. Let\u2019s talk to them, truly listen, and educate by example. Love and presence are the real \u201cloyal friends\u201d that actually save lives.<\/p>

\u201cThe first step toward greatness is to be honest with yourself.\u201d<\/p>

Seneca<\/b><\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t

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De chica crec\u00ed rodeada de gente que fumaba a nuestro alrededor. Era normal: los adultos fumaban y los ni\u00f1os simplemente<\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1431,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1430","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1430","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1430"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1430\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1747,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1430\/revisions\/1747"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1431"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1430"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1430"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/annieplengecounselor.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1430"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}